Cool Funerals?

The most intriguing part of my holiday this year was a glimpse of Chinese funeral traditions. My mom's aunt died on the first day of Spring Festival. We went to her village on the 4th day for a feast.

In the hustle bustle of Spring Festival feasts and parties, everyone forgot to tell me that there was a death in the family. I just thought we were going to my uncle's house to visit. When we got out of the car, there was a guy outside the village with scraps of white sheet tied around his legs and waist. He also had one scrap fashioned into a hat. When we got to the entrance of the village, he got on his hands and knees and bowed to us... similar to how Muslims pray to Mecca. I assumed he was Chinese Muslim and was following some cultural rite for the new year. (Jason later told me it was his mother that died.)

When we got in the courtyard though, everyone in my family was dressed the same way and they were passing out bundles of white cloth to my mom and her sisters as we walked in the door. I'm like, ok honey, what's going on here? Jason says that in China, white is the color of mourning. Village people are normally poor laborers and the bits of sheet are a substitute for white garments. In city funerals, you would likely see people dressed in nice white clothes.

After chatting a bit and drinking some tea, we all moved outside to the courtyard for the feast. I noticed something colorful around the corner and dragged Jason behind me for an explanation. Chinese pinatas???

There were life sized paper machet horses, bulls, and lions. The alley was lined with nearly a dozen of these giant beauties!  Jason said the people in the picture will be servants to help in the afterlife. And that wasn't all, he said that over the span of the day, they would bring in colorful life-sized versions of EVERYTHING you would want in the afterlife... including a refrigerator, TV, and microwave. All this stuff cost about $500 USD and will be paraded out to the field on the day of the funeral and burned to be received by the person on the other side.

I wish I had gotten to see it all. I really wanted to go to the funeral but didn't dare ask. Most of my Chinese family thinks I'm weird enough already.

Tricycle Debacle

Two days ago. I was in a tricycle wreck. Jason always told me not to take tricycles to work because they weren't safe. I should have listened.

I was about a block away from work when it happened. We had stopped for a second because the woman in the VW in front of us had stopped. All of a sudden, WHAM, tricycle sandwich. The Honda hits us and we hit the VW.

Everyone gets out and starts yelling. I'm in the back of the tricycle crying and people off the street are crowding around the tricycle looking in at me like I'm a panda in the zoo.

I pulled myself together and called my boss and my hubbs. To make a long story short... We stood out in the cold for two hours as various authorities came and went. At some point the old lady in the VW yelled at me for being dumb enough to ride in a tricycle then she slipped away quietly before the traffic cops arrived. The cops confiscated the guy's tricycle because he was providing taxi services without a permit. Then they yelled at me for riding in a tricycle. We exchanged insurance and contact information. Hondaman got a ticket.

Then things got super interesting. Tricycles have no back bumper so Hondaman technically ran his car straight into my backside. I wanted to go to the hospital to check things out... just in case. Conveniently enough, Hondaman's wife worked at the hospital around the corner and could get us right in to see the doctor. Even better, Hondaman wanted to drive us there! And my husband saw nothing wrong with either! Only in China.

Once at the hospital, the doctor asked me what I wanted him to do. He said I looked fine and if I had any type of serious injury I'd be feeling dizzy. A car crash veteran, I politely asked for x-rays and muscle relaxers. He had to look up muscle relaxer in the computer and apologized saying there's no such thing in China. I was scolded by three different nurses for riding a tricycle. Jason was scolded twice for not teaching me better.

I'm sore, but I'm alive, and from the way everyone talks about tricycle accidents, I'm lucky at that.

The moral of this story... DON'T RIDE IN THE BACK OF A TRICYCLE.

It's so cold your ears will fall off!

Spring Festival begins in less than a week, but today I would like to introduce you to a lesser known Chinese festival - Dongzhi ("Dong" has a long o and "zhi" sounds like the Ger in German.)

The celebration of Dongzhi has its roots in Taoism. It coincides with the winter solstice and is a sacred turning point when the cold and dark elements of yin give way to the brightness and warmth of yang. In the north it also signals the coming of the six coldest weeks of winter.

On this day in Beijing, people get together and eat jiaozi - Chinese dumplings. In the south, where its warmer, people snack on tang yuan... sticky rice balls often filled with sweet black sesame paste. It's a really yummy treat!

Curiosity #6:
I've always been told, "If you don't eat jiaozi on Dongzhi, your ears will fall off." What's up with that? Well, jiaozi look like ears and it really does get cold enough in Beijing to make you think your ears will fall off! The story goes: A physician during the Han Dynasty noticed that some poor people were suffering from frostbite on their ears. He made a special soup of hot dumplings and gave it to the poor to help them warm their bodies. I guess it was some really good soup! Now, nearly 2,000 years later, we still eat dumplings on this day.

Jiaozi are tastier than ear muffs, I'll bite!

Hello Kitty

Ever seen this little guy up on the counter at your local China Wok Supreme Buffet?

He belongs to a special category of curiosities I call "NOT CHINESE". You wouldn't know that though, as he prowls the countertops of restaurants in both China and America. He is actually popular throughout Asia. This money snatching kitty from Japan is thought to bring luck and fortune. His name is Maneki Neko "The Beckoning Cat" and you can read more about him here.

I propose a toast!

In China, alcohol often flows freely during business parties, and toasting your superiors properly can be serious business.

Curiosity #4:
If you want to impress your boss, make sure your glass is lower than his when toasting. Here's how it works: So we all know what it means to save face. In China, it's just as important to give face too. Lowering your glass shows that you recognize your position in the organizational hierarchy and that you respect your superiors. Westerners naturally tend to raise their glasses higher, unknowingly giving the Chinese an impression of arrogance. In more casual situations, individuals may compete to have the lowest glass until the glasses touch the table or sometimes even the floor.

Cheers!

The bob haircut is not a Chinese fad.

So what's going on? An interestingly large proportion of young Chinese girls have really short, androgynous hair. I first assumed that, like school uniforms, it was a parent's way of enforcing the idea that they are students and not fashion icons.

A couple of years ago, my Chinese friend Debra told me that parents often shave their toddler's heads in the summer because it's cooler and it will make their hair grow back thicker and more beautiful. Even though that technically only covered three year olds in the summertime... I was content with that theory until last month.

So my 8 year old student Linda had the longest, THICKEST hair. Last month she came in with a haircut that can only be interpreted as a punishment. Of course, because I'm a westerner with an underdeveloped sense of face, I blurted out, "What happened to your hair?"

Curiosity #3:
Why do Chinese girls have such short hair? Here's the truth: Linda said, "My mom cut it off because long hair isn't healthy." I asked around about what that really meant. I've discovered that many parents believe that long hair takes more nutrients from the body, specifically the brain. Mothers will cut their daughter's hair in hopes of making them smarter.

I knew it had something to do with school!

"I can see by the way that you hold your chopsticks...

that you'd make a great wife."

No, it's not a Chinese pick-up line. But someone did say that to me once.

There are many taboos and superstitions regarding chopsticks, from how you hold them to where you stick them. I've learned two variations of an old wives tale that connect chopstick etiquette to mate selection.

Curiosity #2:
How you hold your chopsticks illustrates what kind of spouse you will be. Here's how it works: So, a chopstick has two ends. The fat end is the tail and the skinny end is the head. The traditional belief is that if you hold your chopsticks close to the tail, you will marry someone from far away. Inversely, if you hold them near the head, you will marry someone from nearby. My friend Julia believes that the closer you hold your chopsticks to the head, the warmer you will be to your spouse. Well, since I married someone from across the globe, I can't vouch for the accuracy of the traditional wives tale. But if you ask my husband, he'd say that Julia is spot-on!

So, what do your chopsticks say about you?

Giving Birth to a Two Year Old?

It's my birthday so I thought I'd relate a personal story on the topic.

Not long after getting engaged, a discussion with some friends led to the shocking discovery that my fiance Jason was two, yes TWO, years younger than he said he was. How could that be? His answer: he was born two years old and didn't think anything of it.

Curiosity #1:
In China, you can almost give birth to a two year old. Here's how it works: You spend nine months in momma's belly, so when you're born you're technically already a year old. Many Chinese people, especially older people and those from the countryside like my husband, only celebrate their birthday during the Chinese New Year. So, if you're a winter baby like my hubbs and your birthday falls right before Chinese New Year, you can be celebrating your second birthday in the SAME week you were born.

Does that mean double the cake?

Cultural Curiosities

Chinese culture is as deep and rich as its 5000+ year history. It's intriguing and at times seems confusing, contradictory, and impenetrable. Drawn in by China's unique philosophies, I scraped the surface as a Religious Studies major in college. I've gotten my feet wet over the past three years living and working in Beijing. And last year, I opened the floodgates when I married into a Chinese family from a rural village outside of Beijing... which is about the closest an outsider can get to a VIP pass into the strange and exciting world of Chinese customs and traditions.

Despite the fact that my hubby is Chinese and offers a great deal of cultural input and support, I still don't "get" the deep significance of the Beijing Opera. I haven't memorized the dynasties or unraveled the secrets of Confucianism. What I do have is a Chinese family with a big heart. Arising from that and three years of life in China, is a wellspring of cultural curiosities that I'd like to share with you... Recipes, home-remedies, superstitions, customs, traditions, and the like.

Enjoy!